Miss Debrett on Etiquette – #Seduction


When the bedroom door is closed, and
the stage is set for seduction, be aware
that your every move will be subject to
forensic scrutiny. If the seduction
is anticipated you will have
prepared meticulously:
clean bedlinen,
flattering lighting, any
troubling signs of sad
bachelordom (discarded
underwear, games consoles,
top shelf magazines) ruthlessly
excised. Ensure that your bedroom
does not bear the traces of previous occupancy (photographs, stray items of lingerie, cosmetics). No woman is going to be interested, or impressed, by the notches on your bedpost.

Coming on to a woman like a second-rate lothario is an instant turn-off: she won’t be seduced by your Casanova-style antics, just depressed to find herself the last in a long line of ‘conquests’. It is so much better to relax and take it slowly, and be guided by her.

You won’t need a crystal ball to know when she’s giving you a green light; but if proceedings have stalled at amber, or worse, have ground to a halt at red, remember that ‘no’ really does mean ‘no’. Accept her decision with good grace, and never, ever try to change her mind. A gentlemanly response to refusal will earn
you brownie points, and may even ensure you have better luck next time.

If all goes well, remember that your behaviour in the immediate aftermath and on the following morning is absolutely crucial. Women like pillow talk and affection; turned backs, neanderthal grunts and snores are an instant turn-off. Bring her breakfast in bed the following morning and there’s every chance that she’ll be coming back for more.

Miss Debrett’s Top Tips
Set the stage. Think about time and place carefully, and make sure that your choice of location is suitable.
Relax and take things slowly – forceful or unexpected advances are likely to be a turn off. She won’t be seduced by your Casanova-style moves.
Remember that successful seduction requires as much aftercare and nurturing as it does preparation.

Christina’s Take: Well that’s about that for the men, but where are Miss Debrette’s top tips for women? Lie there and think of England? Hmmm… a little one sided I think. So here are a few tips for women I have gleaned from around the web:

Be mysterious – don’t let you date in on your life history from the word go. A little mystic goes a long way.

Don’t jump into bed with anyone on the first date. If you take a little time to know each other, that first time in bed together will be magical

With regards to clothing, reveal just enough, but leave plenty to the imagination. So display those calves to perfection, but don’t go around flaunting everything you’ve got, because unless your on MTV it’s just not sexy.

Share the conversation. He wants to know about you but this is your chance to get to know him, too. Learn as much as you can whilst you’re still in the talking phase… because once you reach the sex phase… it’s sometimes difficult to breathe, let alone talk.

Don’t swear. Most men prefer their women to be lady-like and this is must on first dates. Swearing is sexy if you’re a male builder, but on women it certainly doesn’t carry the same charm or grace.

You may be on the cabbage soup diet, the eat nothing diet, the eat only on Tuesday diet or whatever, but you are not on a diet when you dine out with a prospective date. There’s lot of conversation to be had over the course of a meal, so enjoy yourself! You can always hit the gym tomorrow.


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