The Beginner’s Guide to #BDSM #NSFW

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Original Article Written By Christina Mandara Writing For Marquis Magazine

Contrary to popular belief, BDSM is not all about pain. It’s about control. One person has it all, and the other gives it up. Being at another person’s mercy can be extremely sexy. It’s also quite liberating. You don’t need to think, you just need to obey and feel.

The Basics

BDSM is a double acronym and it stands for Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, and Sado-Masochism.

Bondage

For those in the world that haven’t managed to watch 50 Shades of Grey, bondage is where you tie someone up. Generally lots of rope is involved, but it can include all sorts of things, such as silk scarves, leather cuffs, bondage tape… the list is endless.

Discipline

Controlling a submissive or ‘bottom’ as they often called will require discipline. Submissives are normally expected to obey their dominant within reason, or the chances are they will face a punishment. This doesn’t have to include pain. It could be a few minutes with their nose against the wall, an hour of enforced silence, household cleaning, or some restrictive bondage. When pain is involved, this might mean being spanked with a hand, paddle or whip, kneeling on a bed of rice or, if the dominant is feeling particularly mean, he could book them in for a Brazilian wax session.

Discipline isn’t just for submissives. It takes a great deal of self-control to become a dominant. Meting out even the simplest of punishments requires study and skill. Dominants are also responsible for making all the rules in their relationship and ensuring they are enforced by doling out consequences. The safety of their submissive must be of primary concern at all times.

You could be forgiven for thinking that the dominant/domme has all the control in a BDSM scene, but actually the reverse is true. It’s the submissive that rules the day. Why? If the scene is more than they can handle, they simply say their ‘safe word’ and everything stops. They hold the ultimate power over the dominant.

Read the full article HERE.

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